Taking care of yourself is the hardest, yet most important thing to do. I remind myself daily how important it is to love myself, and it never gets easier.
I am strong. I am a rock. I do, by all definitions, rock.
Yet, I am fluid, I am like the ocean, and I crave change with every sunset.
I’ve done everything right. I’ve moved out, I’ve got a good job, I’ve moved out alone. I’ve checked off the checklist I’ve lived my life by up until this point. There’s nothing I can look back on and regret, or wish I had done differently. I have everything I want and everything I need. I am grateful, and I am proud, and I should have no complaints.
That being said, I can look out my window at night, and see the most perfect juxtaposed view, blending the city skyline with the ocean, the mountains and the trees, and still feel like something’s missing. I feel trapped. But I have no reason to feel so. I can leave whenever I want. I have no commitments, I am unwed, no children, no lease, I can go where ever and be who ever I want.
I can’t think of anywhere else I’d rather be, anyone else I’d rather be or anything else I’d rather be doing. But I’m not convinced this is where I want to be, who I want to be or what I want to be doing.
I guess that all comes with being 21.