I’m not talking about settling, or settling down because I’m absolutely not doing either of those. What I am talking about is settling in, adjusting to changes. This period of my life has been full of changes, from moving to not moving and back and forth I have been making adjustment after adjustment until landing exactly where I am. I’m not settling into Ottawa, I’m settling into the idea of what my life is now. My life is in Ottawa, and my life is in Vancouver. I’m settling into the idea of my life not going perfectly according to a certain plan.
I’ve always taken a while to settle in. When I moved to Victoria my heart was in Vernon, when I moved to Vancouver my heart was in Victoria and it hurt me so much to settle into a new life. This time I’m in Ottawa, but my heart’s in Vancouver and I’ve decided I don’t want to settle into a new life. I’m happy with where I am, and I’m happy to settle into my new normal but in my old home.
Settling in is about accepting where you are, and adjusting to the changes, big or small. Settling in is finding your routine amongst all the moving parts and finding where your heart sings the most. It just so happens for me, my heart sings in Vancouver, and I’m happy to settle in there. Not settling, and not quite settling down – which is what I would be doing if decided to move. I’m settling into a life, where for the first time, I put myself first.